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Because I am a good sport, I am writing to you this morning while wearing a t-shirt designed to look like Wonder Woman’s body, which came with an attachable cape and headband.

It’s what I’m wearing to work today.

Last year, determined not to feel the strangely-inevitable day-of Halloween regret for not participating, I threw on a strange collection of (semi) household items in an effort to at least seem different from how I normally look. A blonde wig, cowboy hat, white dress, and a thick red lipstick job later, I was done.

The kids squinted at me as I passed out the candy, trying, I imagine, to figure out if my hair was real. Finally, one spoke.

“Are you Taylor Swift?”

Hmmm. “Why yes,” you little goblin, “I am.”

I earned some serious respect from that group. And there was nothing creepy about that awe, unlike the adult-sized guy/man/boy/hard to know because he was in a full rubber mask that covered his face, who said to me, simply, and breathily, “I’ll see you later.”

Lights off, end of Halloween 2013.

Anyway. It was still fun. I liked putting on clothes I don’t normally wear, going a bit incognito for a while. But Halloween isn’t really my thing. I never want to take part until the moment when I really, really do, which is always mere days before the big event. It’s at that moment that I decide I have to be something truly awesome and memorable, which never happens.

This year, because I work with young people, I knew I’d participate. My first costume idea came suddenly: Peter Pan! Yes!

(But Peter Pan costumes are expensive, and I don’t get paid until Friday.)

A friend offered to loan me one of hers: a witch, a fairy, a Wonder Woman.

(Totally wanted to be actual Wonder Woman but the dress is strapless, and that just seemed dangerous around The Youth.)

A co-worker reminded me that the day before Halloween is a themed day for our organization, so I did in fact need to dress up as a superhero.

(And no, a cape alone is not enough, thus the t-shirt I’m currently wearing.)

So of course a few nights ago, I realized that I still didn’t have a costume. I started going through my closet. Could I add green tights and a hat to this red dress and become an elf? (But what shoes would I wear? I have none with bells.) Could I use this cowboy hat for something? (Wait! I just want to resurrect Taylor Swift.) I have a sweatband in my car, left over from a previous jokey occasion; could I couple that with my running clothes to be a marathoner? (C’mon. Those shorts are never quite clean; even I have limits on what I will wear to work.)

Nope, nope, nope.

So I got on Amazon. Budget-conscious, I was curious to see what I could come up with.

I wound up ordering a tutu.

A set of wings.

A headband with little yellow balls jauntily suspended from two springs.

On the way home, I bought a yellow shirt at the thrift store, which I will pair with black leggings and black boots.

So tomorrow, instead of Wonder Woman, I’ll be…

A Bee.

(Never mind that it turns out I bought child-sized everything, and now look kind of like I’m going to The Club in my short tutu and small wings. I think I’ll still get my point across.)

Ah well. It’s sure fun for a day (or two!). Happy Halloween!

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